Northeastern Announces NUin Pyongyang

In response to student-led demands that Northeastern “send more first year students abroad to prop up admissions numbers,” university administration has announced a new NUin program in North Korea. “Well, literally every other city on Earth has a NUin program at this point, so it’s about time we open up a campus in North Korea,” university president and god emperor Joseph Aoun said in a statement. The new program promises to give students the opportunity to take new courses exclusive to the Pyongyang campus, including Elementary Juche, Intermediate Juche, and Advanced Kimilsungism–Kimjongilism. At press time, students fleeing NUin Pyongyang had been safely taken to South Korea in a daring midnight operation involving at least three different top secret intelligence agencies.