A number of reports are coming in from a variety of classes that local student Bob Cutter has come back from Thanksgiving break with far less hair than he left with. Multiple students who sit behind him in Physics 2 have whispered to each other everything from “It was starting to look good, what happened?” to “Was there some kind of accident?”
Mr. Cutter himself was difficult to pin down for a statement, but his girlfriend, Melissa Long, was much more open to an interview. “He was finally starting to grow into that haircut he got over the summer. It was a comfortable length, long enough for the curl definition to start showing up.” she claimed. And then disaster struck. “And now, I don’t even know what happened. He said he was looking forward to getting his hair cut in his hometown but I… I never thought it would come to this. It’s like he’s become a completely different person.” At this point, Ms. Long broke down in tears and was unable to answer any more of our reporter’s questions. Our elite news team left Ms. Long to her newfound relationship problems and continued their pursuit of a statement from Mr. Cutter himself.
After following a trail of pointedly silent students, our elite reporting squad was able to track down Mr. Cutter. “It was really way too long. I hadn’t had it cut since summer, a week ago was the longest I’ve ever had my hair. You know I could tell my girlfriend Melissa really hated it, she kept running her fingers though it and commenting on the curl pattern. I don’t even know what a curl pattern is, I don’t want one of those in my hair.” Mr. Cutter waxed rhapsodic about his home town barber claiming he was the “best in the business” and that “you really can’t get the same service here in Boston” before asking our reporter what they thought of his haircut. The interview was then politely ended.
