Skip to content

The Trusty Husky

(Unofficial) Satire Newspaper at Northeastern University

About Us

Category: Campus Happenings

  • Home
  • Campus Happenings
Dance Clubs Descend Into War Over Limited Practice Space
Campus Happenings

Dance Clubs Descend Into War Over Limited Practice Space

Amidst nearly nine inches of snow on the Northeastern campus today, the wind is not the only thing throwing snow at high speed into the…

Trusty Husky Editors February 23, 2026February 23, 2026
Devastated Northeastern Student Receives Brutal Rejection on Valentine’s Day
Campus Happenings

Devastated Northeastern Student Receives Brutal Rejection on Valentine’s Day

Local Northeastern student May Den-Leth came crying to Trusky Husky reporters earlier today following an absolutely savage rejection. “I was genuinely looking forward to staying…

Trusty Husky Editors February 14, 2026February 14, 2026
Steast to be Ritually Slaughtered to Address Wi-Fi Speed Complaints
Campus Happenings

Steast to be Ritually Slaughtered to Address Wi-Fi Speed Complaints

Amid a recent avalanche of complaints about Northeastern’s Wi-Fi speed, Northeastern IT has decided to sacrifice Stetson East Dining Hall to NUWave to increase its…

Trusty Husky Editors February 10, 2026February 10, 2026
Northeastern Announces New “Forced Single” Housing Option
Campus Happenings

Northeastern Announces New “Forced Single” Housing Option

In the face of the current housing shortage at Northeastern that has forced countless students to the faraway lands of Oakland and London, school administrators…

Trusty Husky Editors February 1, 2026
Guy Day Trading Crypto in Class has Lost More Money than You Will Ever Make
Campus Happenings

Guy Day Trading Crypto in Class has Lost More Money than You Will Ever Make

Local 3rd year finance major Monet Richman has lost more money on cryptocurrency than you will ever make. After “investing” over $2.7 million of his…

Trusty Husky Editors January 24, 2026January 24, 2026
Aoun’s Evil Doppelganger Escapes Containment
Campus Happenings

Aoun’s Evil Doppelganger Escapes Containment

Northeastern’s best efforts to keep School President Creature 096 (SPC-096) locked away in the depths of the new box outside of Snell Engineering have failed.…

Trusty Husky Editors January 13, 2026January 13, 2026
Heartbreaking: Guy Whose Hair Looked Good Got Really Bad Haircut Over Thanksgiving
Campus Happenings

Heartbreaking: Guy Whose Hair Looked Good Got Really Bad Haircut Over Thanksgiving

A number of reports are coming in from a variety of classes that local student Bob Cutter has come back from Thanksgiving break with far…

Trusty Husky Editors December 2, 2025
Student Scribbles Out Poster, Communists in Shambles
Campus Happenings

Student Scribbles Out Poster, Communists in Shambles

Lately, pro-communist posters from the “Revolutionary Communists of America” have been seen around campus pasted to streetlights, trash cans, and on those things that are…

Trusty Husky Editors November 30, 2025November 30, 2025
Northeastern Announces OLDwave, Telegraph Service to Begin “Soon”
Campus Happenings

Northeastern Announces OLDwave, Telegraph Service to Begin “Soon”

Northeastern has been forced to take drastic measures following the continuous and unending failure of the Wi-Fi network that is NUwave. Today marks the start…

Trusty Husky Editors November 19, 2025November 19, 2025
Contraceptive Vending Machine Moved to the Middle of Ruggles
Campus Happenings

Contraceptive Vending Machine Moved to the Middle of Ruggles

In an effort to make contraceptives even more accessible to the student body, the Office of Prevention and Education at Northeastern (OPEN) has made the…

Trusty Husky Editors November 12, 2025November 12, 2025

Posts navigation

Older posts

Recent "News"

  • Dance Clubs Descend Into War Over Limited Practice Space
  • Devastated Northeastern Student Receives Brutal Rejection on Valentine’s Day
  • Steast to be Ritually Slaughtered to Address Wi-Fi Speed Complaints
  • Northeastern Announces New “Forced Single” Housing Option
  • Guy Day Trading Crypto in Class has Lost More Money than You Will Ever Make

Archives

  • February 2026
  • January 2026
  • December 2025
  • November 2025
  • October 2025
  • September 2025

Categories

  • Boston News
  • Campus Happenings
  • National Events
  • Op-ed

About Us

Our Journalistic "Standards"

Privacy Policy

Join the Trusty Husky

The Trusty Husky 2026