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(Unofficial) Satire Newspaper at Northeastern University

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Month: December 2025

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Santa’s Sleigh Shot Down Over Venezuelan Airspace
National Events

Santa’s Sleigh Shot Down Over Venezuelan Airspace

Santa Claus' sleigh was confirmed to have crashed Wednesday night in the Venezuelan state of Carabobo. Paramedics dispatched from the nearby city of Valencia pronounced…

Trusty Husky Editors December 26, 2025December 26, 2025
Green Line’s Hunger for Human Flesh “Dangerously Unsatisfied”
Boston News

Green Line’s Hunger for Human Flesh “Dangerously Unsatisfied”

The Green Line has built a reputation not only for being slow, noisy, and inefficient, but also for being deadly. Between its many derailments, propensity…

Trusty Husky Editors December 5, 2025December 6, 2025
Heartbreaking: Guy Whose Hair Looked Good Got Really Bad Haircut Over Thanksgiving
Campus Happenings

Heartbreaking: Guy Whose Hair Looked Good Got Really Bad Haircut Over Thanksgiving

A number of reports are coming in from a variety of classes that local student Bob Cutter has come back from Thanksgiving break with far…

Trusty Husky Editors December 2, 2025

Recent "News"

  • Aoun’s Evil Doppelganger Escapes Containment
  • Northeastern Captures BU President, BU to Become Satellite Campus
  • Santa’s Sleigh Shot Down Over Venezuelan Airspace
  • Green Line’s Hunger for Human Flesh “Dangerously Unsatisfied”
  • Heartbreaking: Guy Whose Hair Looked Good Got Really Bad Haircut Over Thanksgiving

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